Archive for June, 2005

Major threat indeed

So it looks like Nike with its bazillion dollar marketing budget decided they should just go ahead and steal some old album art work from the band Minor Threat to promote a skateboarding tour they are sponsoring. The irony of this situation is unbeatable. Ian MacKaye (front man for Minor Threat and Fugazi,

as well as lesser known Embrace) has always promoted anti-establishment ideals. Even though both Minor Threat and Fugazi gained enormous underground popularity, the bands always refused to sign on with big labels. I remember when Fugazi was still touring, their shows never cost more than $5 and their albums were always priced considerably lower than even their Indie counterparts. Needles to say, MacKay is pretty pissed off, and rightfully so. I hope that they sue the hell out of Nike and get a chunk of cash.

Speaking of, Tom Waits has had a few issues that I might compare to this. He has been approached on a number of occasions to use his distinct and highly recognizable voice for advertising, which he has always refused. Waits says, “Commercials are an unnatural use of my work. It’s like having a cow’s udder sewn to the side of my face. Painful and humiliating.” Waits has gone to court on more than one occasion to defend his stance on the issue. Hopefully MacKaye and his record company Dischord will have as much luck.

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American idiot

I watched the president’s speech last night and I would give you a summary of what he said, but unfortunately he did not say a damn thing. Honestly with all his rambling he may as well have stood up there in silence, it would have been equally as productive. He was asked to give the people some insight into his strategy to get out of Iraq, but he just mentioned 9/11 instead. Just a reminder, in case

you have forgotten Mr. President, what happened to our friends in New York has no direct connection to your little war. It infuriates me that this monkey continues to waste our time and money and does not feel that he needs to be held accountable for any of it. Furthermore, it is insulting that he has such little regard for the intelligence of the American people that he believes he can continue to make us happy by feeding us crap with a side of not-so-innocent smiles and smirks. I saw a t-shirt this weekend that I feel we should all take to heart, it said Stop bitching start a revolution”. Yes, let’s.

Here is a great number by Utah Philips (mp3). I think he sums things up pretty nicely.

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Back again

I saw that Primus was added to the Lollapalooza lineup. The only other Lollapalooza show I went to was in 1993 and both Primus and Dinosaur Jr were also on that bill. Now if they could only get Tool to come back again, that would be perfect. Although I am sure that a side stage would never be able to accommodate them now.

Answers.com has some interesting histroy on Lollapalooza as well as all the lineups from festivals past.

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Take pride

Sunday was a fun day hanging out at Mark’s for the pride parade. His place is on the second floor and right near the beginning of the parade so we all had great window views. A few paraders were even kind enough to attempt to throw beads all the way up to us – and some even made it! The Chicagoist has a nice little summary and some additional links as well as a link to some pictures.

You can find my pictures here. Don’t be shy, click on the small images to see them in all their robustness!

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Don’t eat your brother

This is a rather disturbing story: Boy had fetus in stomach

Doctors in Bangladesh say they have removed a long-dead foetus (that is ‘fetus’ for us American English speakers) from the abdomen of a teenage boy who was complaining of stomach pains.

Eek eek! I guess the locals were told that a boy gave birth and they all rushed to the hospital to see.

That reminds me of a story I heard a long time ago about an old woman who went to the doctor complaining of abdominal pain and supposedly they found she had been carrying around the skeleton of a near term fetus for a decade.

Jeez – I hope I don’t come down with any abdominal pains anytime soon – sheesh!

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I seen her in the back of taco bell with handcuffs

A great top 11 from BBspot for all the super geeks out there 😉


Yo Momma Insults for Physicists
By David Olsen

11. Yo momma’s so fat the only curve on her is the curve of space-time that occurs around any super massive object.
10. Yo momma’s so ugly Schroedinger’s cat was all-dead just knowing she existed.
9. Yo momma’s so fat she accounts for the 90 % of missing matter in the universe.
8. Yo momma’s so fat her first diet ever is going to be called “The Big Crunch”.
7. Yo momma’s so stupid she thinks Galileo is Spanish for ‘girlfriend’.
6. Yo momma’s so fat she contradicts a heliocentric solar system.
5. Yo momma’s so stupid all of her family calls her a special relativity.
4. Yo momma’s so stupid she thinks “Haw” is a middle name, and Steven Hawking wrote “The Stand”.
3. Yo momma’s so ugly, stuff running from her accounts for the acceleration of the expansion of the universe.
2. Yo momma’s so fat her waistline is called the event horizon.
1. Yo momma’s so stupid she thinks this line is false.

Anyone got some good Yo Momma jokes for me?
Here are a few to get your creative mind working

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A good wife always knows her place

This sounds like a bunch of bullsh*t if you ask me, considering there is probably a plus or minus 3% margin of error, but I found it interesting all the same. Married men earn more if wives do the chores? I mean really, do I want to do all the household chores just to increase my future husband’s salary by 3%? That does not sound like that great of a deal to me.

But that wage premium disappears if wives go out to work themselves or don’t do most of the housework.

But wouldn’t our household income increase considerably more than 3% of his salary if I were out working for a living too? I don’t get it… sounds like some plan to encourage women to get back in the kitchen, where they belong!

Let’s not forget Housekeeping Monthly’s “The good wife’s guide” (circa 1955) (you might have to zoom to read)
Some of the more important duties:

• Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him
• Listen to him… Let him talk first – remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours
• Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity… You have no right to question him

I get a kick out of that list every time.

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Let me whisper in your ear

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Summer treat gone terribly wrong

Snapple created a 17.5 tons popsicle to promote their new line of frozen treats. Turns out that popsicles do not last too long in the Manhattan summer heat. Giant Popsicle Melts, Floods New York Park.

“What was unsettling was that the fluid just kept coming,” Stuart Claxton of the Guinness Book of World Records told the Daily News. “It was quite a lot of fluid. On a hot day like this, you have to move fast.”

What a mess!

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SLC to SF, Road Trip Part Deux

Well it turns out the Honda wasn’t totaled, which is great – except that it had to get picked up. We met in SLC and drove once again from there to San Francisco.

In other exciting news, I have put pictures from the trip in my very own brand new gallery which you will find at www.chipmonkey.net/gallery, otherwise known as “The Peanut Gallery”. I will be adding a whole hell of a lot more stuff there in the near future.

Getting on the red eye tonight to head back to Chicago… see you all soon.

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